Why?

I have a lot of important life questions.

Why does the box of colored goldfish crackers claim they taste the same when they don’t?

Why do my kids hate sleeping?

Why is cherry coke so good?

Why can my two-year-old eat more pancakes than my husband?

Why are there so many annoying flies in my house?

Why do I love double stuf oreos infinity much?

Why are there so many terrible children’s books that managed to get published?

Why are the Target clearance stickers so hard to resist?

Why do I look 100 times more pregnant at almost 7 months than ladies due next week?

Why can’t I remember to buy glue at the store?

Why does a giant spider think he can live on the handle to the shed I need to open?

As you can see, I have some really pressing issues I’ve been pondering.

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4 Responses to Why?

  1. Amy says:

    I want to play!

    Why do I act like cookies have medicinal value?

    Why does my child wake up the instant I begin to doze off AND

    Why does my child wake up when he is still an exhausted monster OR

    Why is my child Possessed?

    Why can’t I blow dry my hair?

    Why is my living space a disaster even though it is only one room and all my belongings except one suitcase worth is in storage?

    Why don’t I use the camera I spent so much money on when we had no money?

    Why did I get pregnant again AND

    Why haven’t I already scheduled my spouse’s vasectomy?

    Why is my butt so flat when it used to be so resplendent?

    Why does my hair grow so fast that having a short haircut is financially unsustainable?

    Why is it still so hot even though it’s September?

    Why can’t I ever make a decent pie crust?

    Why can’t I think of anything to make for dinner except macaroni and cheese, even if I try my hardest?

    Why has my child been sick with a series of non-serious but totally life-altering maladies?

    Why molars? Why?!

    Why can’t I always get the new iPhone with our upgrades and my spouse can continue to be happy with his 3G?

    Why did I have to find out that all the normal good tasting food causes cancer?

    Why do people start drinking as adults when they didn’t form the habit as idiot teenagers?

    Why did I live in a state without trader joes for thirteen years?

    Why do I live in the US?

    Why don’t you live next door to me?!?!????!!!!?!???

  2. Casey says:

    I agree with all of these.

    100%.

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