Dear Cuenca

Posted on January 28, 2012 by kelsey

Dear Cuenca,

You may already know this, but I love you.  I love your huge cathedral with big blue domes.  I love your central park with scary stuffed horses for kids to get their pictures taken on.  I love your streets, some with huge excellent sidewalks and others with hardly a crumbling curb to perch upon.  I love your food, your soup, your aji, your exploding corn.  I love your people, and I really love your orphans.  I love walking around feeling like home.  I love the memories we have made together.  I love your car sirens and barking dogs and excessive amount of honking.  I even love your traffic.  I love your rivers and the laundry being done on the banks.  I love your fruit markets and I even can almost tolerate the smell of your open air meat markets.  I love your restaurants and the way you deep fry hot dogs.  I love your beautiful green hills.  I love your sunshine and your bursts of crazy rain.  I love your scary blue buses and your sea of taxis.  I love your lottery vendors, your ladies coming to get scraps for their pigs to eat, and your teenage sons walking down the street arm in arm with their moms.  I love your babies and I love your old people.  I love seeing giant pigs roasting beside scary guinea pigs on the side of the road.  I love how much you love soccer, and I love all the fireworks.

I guess what I am trying to say, Cuenca, is that I love you.  Let’s be BFF.

Love,
Kelsey

Posted in ecuador, gratitude | 4 Comments

We Have a Sleep Problem (Again)

Posted on January 27, 2012 by kelsey

You might remember how our sleeping situations was really awful.  In the last few months in the US sleeping was not so bad.  The kids were sleeping on twin mattresses on the floor of their room, not pushed together like before.  Putting them to bed meant a bit of snuggling, then sitting by the door reading until they fell asleep.  It was still a lengthy process, but at least I got to read during part of it.  Also they slept a lot better, and normally only one would wake up once in the night.

Then we moved.  Now the kids are again sleeping on twin mattresses pushed together into one giant bed.  I have been so lazy (in part because I have been doing 99% of the putting to bed because of Aaron’s foot problems and the kids’ mommy-neediness due to the new living situation) I have been snuggling between them until they fall asleep.  This is a long and often frustrating process.  Additionally because they are sleeping in essentially the same bed, they wake each other up all night long.  For some reason even though they go to bed in normal positions, they end up like this:

This means that I end up in their room every night, and because I am too tired I just stay in their bed.  And get kicked.  And half-sleep.  It’s horrible.  I mostly just wrote this blog to whine, but I think instead I will go back to the snuggle-read-beds-apart situation so I can get some sleep.  Wish me luck.

(P.S. Harmon doesn’t really have half brown and half black hair.  I am just too lazy to go fix it.)

Posted in harmon, sammy, Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Me Gusta/No Me Gusta

Posted on January 26, 2012 by kelsey

Me gusta:

-Avocados.  They are so cheap which  means I can eat one every day if I want.  Which I do.
-Fancy fruits.  Also so cheap and super delicious.
-Sunshine every day.  It rains some almost every day, but not enough to make you want to sit inside with your pjs on all the time.
-Walking a lot.  I am getting less fat.
-Skype.  The kids are especially loving video chatting with friends and family.  If you have skype and want to chat it up with us, let me know.

No me gusta:

-Fake lightbulbs.  Ecuador has apparently also outlawed real lightbulbs.  The only plus side is that the ones here are 4 times as bright as the ones in the US so I can sort of deal.
-Black feet.  Our house is mostly unsealed wooden floors which even if you clean them every day still turn the bottom of your feet a disgusting shade of black.
-Only singlestuffed oreos.  I think that speaks for itself.
-Having to throw your toilet paper in the garbage.  Supposedly the pipes can’t handle the paper.  Whether or not it is true, it is not a good part of life.

Posted in ecuador, likes, Uncategorized | 3 Comments

The Ease of Difficulty.

Posted on January 25, 2012 by kelsey

I have been thinking a lot lately about why life seems easier in Ecuador than back in the US.  Because even though something like going to the doctor takes 7 stops to different windows just to get your appointment (ok, that was a slight exaggeration) it still seems easier.  I have finally come to the conclusion that there is a great ease in the difficulty of things.

For example: 6 days a week I wash a load of laundry by hand.  This entails gathering laundry, adding soap and water, letting it soak, swishing it around a bunch, letting Sammy and Harmon walk on it in the tub, scrubbing it as needed, several rinses, putting it into the wringer part of the industrial mop bucket (classy! but saves my wrists), then wringing it by hand, and finally hanging it up to dry on the lines.  Oh wait, but then I have to watch the weather all day, because it rains probably 5 or 6 days a week, even if only for a few minutes, and bring all the laundry inside to find creative locations to temporarily let it dry (banister, kitchen chairs, doorknobs…).  Ridiculous, right?  But here’s the thing, it is better.  If I only have to throw a load in the washer (ok, obviously I hope to someday have a washer again) then I am bored.  What will we do kids?  Let’s go to Target for no reason…  Again don’t get me wrong, I love Target, but after purging most of our belongings it is obvious that random trips to Target were a bit out of control before we left.

Another example: going anywhere with just me and the kids.  This has been especially pronounced because Aaron is not only working during the day, but pretty much immobile the rest of the time as well.  But the kids and I cannot sit in the house all day.  Since we don’t own a car, that leaves two options: 1. Walk and 2. Taxi.  I love walking.  That is one of the many reasons I wanted to move back here, if you live near enough to town, you can walk to tons of places.  But obviously with a 2 and 3-year-old, our range is limited.  Going two blocks to the park: easy.  Going almost a mile to the downtown park with the cool huge cathedral: almost impossible.  While we could walk it, me alternating carrying the kids, most days it just seems like too much.  Taxiing here is really cheap, but if you do it several times a day and you happen to currently have zero income, it can add up quickly.  This to me at first seemed pretty limiting, how on earth am I going to get anything done/ever leave the house?  But here’s what is actually happening: I pick and choose, and end up with better choices than when I would just throw the kids in the car and drive somewhere (anywhere!) back in the US.  Now instead of hitting up the McDonald’s drive-thru just because, we plan to go to the Museum and actually go.

I guess what I am trying to get at is that although on the surface it seems like lots of things that I was accustomed to doing in the US are more difficult here, it actually makes my life better.  I am less bored, I am more fulfilled, which obviously leads to greater happiness.  And although I know I find great joy in visiting with the orphans, I think that the rest of life here really is great aside from that.  I wish that I could just choose to be like that wherever I was, that if I lived in Renton or Bellevue or South Dakota that I could just choose to do things that were fulfilling instead of just doing something to not be bored.  But as it stands I am a lazy person who is prone to sit around, so I am glad for the kick in the pants that living here is.  I obviously had an idea that it would be like this, and I am glad that it is shaping up to be what I was looking for.

Posted in ecuador, gratitude | 3 Comments

No More Injuries, Please!

Posted on January 24, 2012 by kelsey

I failed to mention that almost two weeks ago while visiting the Roseros, Harmon was running on the back patio area, tripped and fell, and hit his head quite hard on a concrete wall corner.  It had a very large goose-egg, and almost immediately turned an awful shade of black.  In the time since then it has turned mostly yellow, but a little bit of color still remains.  I off and on worry that he has smashed his skull in half, but since he doesn’t complain and still knows his colors in Spanish I figure he is probably ok.

And obviously you now know about Aaron’s issues which remain to be solved.

Tonight Sammy was feeling left out and decided to fall off her chair right before dinner.  I ran over to pick her up, and it appeared that her right arm had come out of the socket.  So so so great, exactly what we needed.  She was crying, Aaron was freaking, so we moved it a little bit and then she was able to partially move it.  Since we live across the street from a clinic and emergency room it was hurriedly decided that I would run over there with her.  On the way over Sammy was crying and saying “no doctor!  I feel better!  I happy now!  I feel better!”  When I assured her she would not be getting a shot like her father this morning and would only be receiving a checkup she stopped professing her happiness.

The pediatrician was still hanging around and we were able to see him within 5 minutes.  He moved her arm around a lot, which made her cry, but when I asked her if he was hurting her or if she was just scared, she said just scared.  I am sure it hurt too, but Sammy is not fond of strangers, especially strangers who are touching her.  I would probably add strangers who are touching her on her recently injured shoulder to her list of great dislikes.  He told me that he didn’t see anything (by this point she was able to fully extend her arm every which way) and that to be sure I could go get an x-ray.  Lucky!  Sammy took some medicine for the pain, and has been totally fine all evening.  If she is hurting at all in the morning, we will get her x-rayed, as we happen to be going first thing back to the hospital to pick up Aaron’s lab test and see his doctor again, so why not?  We are just glad that baby girl seems to be ok.

Bad things come in threes, so I am totally safe from serious injury, right???

Posted in harmon, I don't love it, sammy | 8 Comments

Aaron Still Hates the Doctor.

Posted on January 23, 2012 by kelsey

8am: Go to doctor at the clinic across the street. We are seen immediately. She is nice and offers to give him an anti-inflammatory injection, but also says we need to get x-rays, which they don’t do there. We will have to go to the military hospital instead. Aaron decides not to get shot because he is afraid his foot will feel better and he will hurt it worse by using it.

8:20am: Take taxi to military hospital. Ask where x-rays are. Go to x-rays, get directed to appointment desk/waiting line. Get told to get x-rays first, then make appointment, but first pay for x-rays at other window. Go to other window, get bill, go to another window to pay. Return to x-rays. Taken immediately.

8:50am: Return to appointment desk/line and show that I have Aaron’s x-rays. Told I can’t have appointment with doctor recommended by first doctor, but I can come back at 7:30am tomorrow to get in line for an appointment. Eventually I am told that I could see a different doctor, or rather I can get Aaron a number in line for the 3pm doctor. I leave to ask Aaron what he wants. He says whatever is fastest. I return to appointment desk/wait in line and talk to a completely different person. This person tells me that I could see the doctor who is currently there, which is neither the 3pm doctor, nor the doctor I initially asked to see. I am told to go pay at the pay window (no stop at the intermediate window this time) and they will give me my number (for my place in line.) I do this and get number 9. It is now 9:15am.

9:16am: Find office of doctor and ask everyone else who is waiting what number they are on. Two. Take kids to get snacks while Aaron waits.

11:15am: Beyond happy when it is finally Aaron’s turn. Tell doctor about Aaron’s feet, show him x-rays, he checks out Aaron’s feet and determines he needs some nerve help. I don’t fully understand all that he says, I am thinking Aaron is getting an injection like the first doctor says, but then we are sent to the pharmacy down the hallway. We wait outside the doctor’s office while he sees 3 more patients.

12:30pm: Doctor gives Aaron some “nerve treatment” in his mouth, wherein he pokes him several times with a needle filled with some sort of anesthetic. This gives Aaron no relief, but makes us all smile when Harmon instructs “be brave dad! Don’t cry!” (He didn’t cry.) Next the doctor wants to see Aaron’s foot again and proceeds to jab him over 20 times in the leg, ankle, and foot. Each time he asks “does this hurt?” and Aaron says, “yes it stings” so the doctor keeps going, because he is not looking for stinging, he is looking for nerve pain! The doctor runs out of juice in the needle setup and decides this “randompuncture” as Aaron has termed it is not working. We are sent away with no concrete diagnosis, but an order for fasting blood work tomorrow.

Tomorrow we will get up first thing and get blood work done, followed by a trip on Wednesday morning back to the same doctor. Really, I can’t imagine why Aaron doesn’t like doctors. It’s not like it was a big deal or anything…

Posted in aaron, ecuador | 5 Comments

The Man With the Broken Feet

Posted on January 22, 2012 by kelsey

I have perhaps mentioned to a few of you how Aaron is broken.  Probably not actually broken in the bones, but broken enough that he often cannot walk.  So maybe broken in the feet bones.  Almost two weeks ago when we moved in Aaron’s feet were bugging him.  He had been wearing brand new sneakers and we had been doing a ton of walking.  Then when we moved in he spent half the first day mopping in very hard sandals.  By last Wednesday he was in more pain, and by Thursday one foot was so bad it left him completely immobile.  By Sunday he was able to limp around, but the injured foot remained quite painful.  By Monday the first injured foot was feeling a lot better, and we spent a lot of time looking for a fridge.  By the time our fridge was delivered on Wednesday, Aaron’s first foot was feeling better but the other foot was having the same problem as the first.  By Thursday all of the walking (done in different shoes this time) left him almost immobile again.  Today is Sunday and he is more or less completely immobile now with pain in both feet.

Let me take this moment to point out that Aaron is stubborn and I am a baby.  If I was hurting to the level I think Aaron is, I would have been begging for someone to carry me to the doctor the first day.  Aaron on the other hand has held out for quite a while now.  On Friday night when poor Aaron was dying in pain, I declared that unless he had a miraculous recovery by Monday he would be attending the doctor even if I had to bring some friends over to carry him down the stairs and across the street to the doctor.

Hopefully tomorrow will bring decreased pain so he can hobble down himself.  In the meantime you can find him “cruising” around the house with a chair from the table, one knee propped up and the other foot dragging along.  He says it’s liberating.

Posted in aaron | 6 Comments

My Grown-Up Girls

Posted on January 20, 2012 by kelsey

On Monday evening we tagged along with the OSSO volunteers to the girls orphanage.  This orphanage usually houses girls age 5-21, although from what I can tell the oldest girl currently living there is 18.  Our kids were warmly welcomed by a swarm of screaming girls yelling “bebe!  bebe!!”  (Sammy was more popular than Harmon, sorry dude.)  At first the kids were overwhelmed, but Harmon quickly warmed up to playing on their swingset and after a while Sammy decided that the girls were safe enough and began playing soccer with a girl holding each of her hands (“We playin SOCCER!”).  It was sweet to see the excitement of the girls towards my kids, kids that they had never met before, undeserved adoration based on nothing but an affiliation with the OSSO girls.  I also received lots of hugs and love based on the same premise.

Before we went Aaron asked me if I was nervous the girls wouldn’t remember me.  I told him obviously not because I was 100% sure none of them would remember me.  Our last visit was in 2009, and we saw the girls one time.  Before that we lived here for 6 months in 2007-2008 and I did spend a lot of time teaching a self-esteem class there, but that was 4 years ago.  To my surprise a few of the girls claimed to remember me.  They were 12-year-olds, who would not have come to the class, but they were girls I knew when they first came to the girls house in 2004 when they were only 4.  The likelihood of them actually remembering me seemed low, but who knows.  It was crazy to see these girls who had blossomed from sweet shy little girls into loud and crazy pre-teens.  Additionally another 12-year-old who I knew back when she was at the baby orphanage in 2004 said she remembered me, which I believed a little more, in part because I had much more interaction with her, and probably a little bit in part because I really wanted to believe it.  Some of these kids really feel like my own children, so I can’t help but want to believe it.

I remember a lot of volunteers struggled with going home, thinking that none of the kids would remember them.  While I understood this and believed it was true, I always felt that even though the kids might not remember us, they would always be better because we were there.  And they are.  It has been such a blessing to me to be able to come back here so many times.  To see the kids that I knew as babies and toddlers and little girls “all grown up” is amazing.

Last night I went to the girls house with the OSSO volunteers again, without Aaron and the kids.  I went in hopes of finding some of the older girls I didn’t find on Monday, as they often struggle with boys, English homework, self-esteem, etc. and I enjoy talking to them.  As it turned out there was only one older girl, and 18-year-old who I knew from way back in 2004 when she was only 10.  She didn’t remember me, but I was so happy to see her all grown up, intelligent, funny, beautiful, kind, and talented.  She challenged me and another volunteer to a game of basketball, in the which she and her team soundly destroyed us.  Apparently if you are a foot taller and have long monkey arms, you still can’t win.  Despite my lack of athletic skill and general out-of-shapeness we had a great time.  I look forward to many more Mondays there with my family, and more Thursdays by myself, getting reacquainted with the girls I knew and making friends with the new ones.

There really is nothing better than seeing these kids growing up happy and thriving.  They all still struggle with many problems, but I think that 2004 Kelsey would be really happy.  I know 2012 Kelsey is.

Posted in ecuador, osso | 3 Comments

Whiny Kids/Haunted House Museum

Posted on January 19, 2012 by kelsey

Yesterday my kids were ultimately whiny.  I go nuts pretty quick when my kids get whiny, and I was a mean mom yesterday who may have raised her voice more than she should have.  To be fair, we have been doing all sorts of things like unpacking, shopping for major purchases, getting settled, etc. I have not been giving them as much direct attention as they are used to (read: a ridiculously lot, those needy kids!) and I think that is why they have started going mental/whiny.

Last night I decided that I could probably make them less whiny by changing my behavior first, especially since we are mostly done with major shopping/settling activities.  Today instead of trying to be productive first thing (I normally hand wash a load of laundry first thing while the kids run around and play in the water on the patio) I just read them books for a while.  Then we did the laundry.  Then I took them to the museum/ruins/park that is a couple blocks from our house.  I went yesterday while they were napping to see how much it cost, it used to be $4 or so, but now it is free.  So we went and inside and on the first floor they have a trampoline.  It is the weirdest museum.  There is a little poem about how you are flying in a confined space (it’s just a regular trampoline with netting around it) which was a bit silly, but the kids loved jumping.  But remember how it is the weirdest museum?  Currently half of it is under renovation, and in front of the construction areas are pieces of video “art” which include such “gems” as a big man and a small lady in a room with a big barrel full of water in which he is holding her under for long periods at a time, which I believe is called “confession” (AWFUL!).  Half of the museum is like a haunted house, all dimly lit with creepy mannequins, not to mention the room with the REAL shrunken heads which is pitch black except for the creepy creepy heads.  Both kids declined entering that room, declaring it to be too spooky.  I didn’t complain.  The museum also houses an extensive old coin and money collection, as it is the Banco Central Museum, which is pretty interesting.  After jumping on the trampoline again we decided it was time to see the outside area.

The museum and bank sit on a huge chunk of land on a big hill.  The grounds include old Cañari rebuilt ruins, and are home to a little zoo which includes a ton of super cool parrots and eagles, llamas, and lots of grass, flowers, and a little river.  We had a fun time exploring and enjoying the warm sun.  As we walked home and stopped to get 15 cent popsicles I reminded myself of two things: 1. When your kids are whiny remember to look at why instead of being mean.  Chances are if I just give them some direct attention first, then try to get things done it will work better. (As circumstances allow, obviously.)  2. That is the weirdest museum.  Who puts a trampoline, a scary abuse video, an extensive coin collection and dark rooms with realistic creepy mannequins together in a museum?  Seriously?  Is that why they made it free???

Do you want to come visit yet?

Posted in ecuador, Uncategorized | 4 Comments

How to get things done, Ecuador style

Posted on January 18, 2012 by kelsey

#1: How to get Internet

1. Take taxi to internet company.  Hope you can find it even though you have been there 5 other times in the past, because no taxi driver ever seems to know where the hidden street is.

2. Find out that a lot has changed in 4 years and be glad to quickly get internet set up with installation set for 2 days later.

3. Wait on appointed day in time slot of 8am-12pm.  At 11:50am call guy who sold you internet to ask if they are coming because you are hungry.  Guy tells you of course, they will be there any minute.

4.  11:59am 4 guys show up to install internet.  It should be noted that the internet office is approximately 7 minutes from our house.  The following process occurs: show them where you want the modem, guys take ladder and put it on power lines to connect internet cable from the street pole, guys drill giant hole in the front of your house into the front room (no big deal, I wanted a giant hole there in the house that I do not own, thankyouverymuch), and then connect the cable precariously tied to the power lines to your modem.  One hour later internet is functioning and your husband has to sweep and mop the front room.

(This was actually much easier than last time when we had to go up on the roof of the building we were living in and help them install the receiver piece and then thread the cable down 4 floors into our apartment where they also drilled a hole into the wall.  It was a much smaller hole that time though.)

#2: How to buy a fridge

1. Walk 8 blocks to first store.  Carry toddlers entire way, then try not to go insane while looking at fridges while they try to break everything.

2. Decide to look at another store 8 blocks away.  Carry toddlers entire way, then try not to go insane while looking at fridges at 2 more stores.  Decide fridges at first store were cheaper and better.

3. Instead of going back to the same store, decide to go to the far away mall to look at fridges even though you know they are more expensive.   Walk 16 blocks home carrying toddlers, one of which falls asleep with her hand in her chip bag and wakes up when you try to take it way.  Eventually she falls completely asleep and chip bag falls to the ground.

4. Get home and taxi to the far away mall.  Spend 2 minutes determining that fridges really are more expensive there.  Get some groceries and taxi home.  Make everyone take a nap.

5. Around 5:30 realize that you still haven’t got a fridge and walk quickly while carrying toddlers to first store, hoping it isn’t closed.  It isn’t.

6. Tell salesman you want to buy the fridge.  Go to cash register to pay with $100 bills and everyone looks like they want to murder you.  6 employees are now required, one makes you initial all the bills and then the cashier is sent DOWN THE STREET with your money to make copies.  10 minutes later he returns, and while you have been biting your nails your husband has been trying to stop the children from destroying everything in the store.  20 more minutes pass and your bills are deemed not counterfeit, and you are given your change and a tiny regular receipt.  Maybe it’s just me, but when I am buying a fridge I want a big receipt.  I got a bigger receipt 10 minutes later when I bought $1.50 worth of candies.

7. Schedule delivery for the next morning.  Confirm 6 times that you want it in the morning.  As you are walking out salesman says “ok by noon then!”  Suddenly you wonder when you will get your fridge.

8. Wait all morning for your fridge.  At 12:15 call the store and ask where your fridge is, because it is no longer morning.  Salesman assures you that it is on it’s way.  You assure him this is not ok, because you have sat at home all morning waiting and there is no fridge at your house.  He tells you the transport company was all full and you tell him that he should not have told you he could have it delivered in the morning if he could not make that happen.  He says it’s not his fault but the transport company’s and you tell him that it is his fault and you are not especially pleased with him.  He says he can give you the transport company’s number and you tell him he can call them himself.  He then is suddenly sure that the fridge will be there any minute.

9. Wait 25 more minutes and suddenly your fridge arrives.  (It almost seems to be the right amount of time it would take to wrap your fridge in thick plastic and strap it into a ‘truck’ and drive it to your house.)  You laugh really hard because your fridge has just arrived in the back of an el camino.  Your husband tells you it is not an el camino, and is much smaller than an el camino.  You don’t care because your fridge is here and the nice “transport company” carries it up the stairs for you and now you don’t have to panic that someone has your $100 bills and you won’t be getting a fridge.

The End.

Posted in ecuador | 3 Comments