1. I have been seeing a lot of cute babies lately. And I even mean cute newborns. This is stressful because what if my baby is ugly when it comes out, or stays ugly? I realize that I will love it anyway, and will be in denial if it is ugly, but come on, no one wants an ugly baby. And what if I knew it was ugly? And people were all lying and telling me how cute it was? That would be the worst. These are the things that keep me up at night.
2. We started our birthing classes last night. We are doing a series based on the book “Birthing From Within” in case you are familiar with it. It went pretty good. It was on Capitol Hill and taught by a really cool lady with neat dreadlocks, but was surprisingly less “hippie” than I imagined. But we were in second to last place for the hippiest couple. We will make sure to make some organic french fries for our turn to make snacks to gain a couple of spots higher in the ranking.
3. At the end of said birthing class the teacher showed us how to get comfortable to sleep. If you wonder what she taught, I will refer you back to the excellent diagram that I made. I gave my body a high-five for being so smart to know where all the pillows should go. Except I left one out, for shoulder pain you can put one under your armpit. I don’t know if this will really work because the entire weight of my body resting on my shoulder will probably not be lessened by a little pillow. But I may just have to try it. But first I will have to make it, because we are for sure out of pillows.
4. As I’m sure you were aware, it’s almost my birthday. I was at a stop light the other day and looked in my mirror and thought I saw a gray hair. Turns out it was just a hair the sun had turned light brown and since the sun was shining on it, it looked even lighter. That’s good because I think you should wait until you are 26 or have children to get any.
5. I still really like oreos. I wonder if they make organic oreos I could deep fry and bring to our birthing class for snacks. But why would you deep fry something that is already so delicious? I doubt that deep frying an oreo would make it better. Just weirder when you stuck it in milk.
6. I went to my midwife appointment on Wednesday and everything looks good. I did the glucose test and it was pretty much like drinking flat orange pop (so pretty tasty, but I missed the carbonation) but then felt like you ate 4 candy bars on an empty stomach. So all in all not too bad, just killed my desire for sugar for the rest of the day. I now start my visits every 2 weeks, which seems crazy since I still feel like I have a bazillion weeks left. Maybe they just like me. That’s what I tell myself.
7. I think that’s it. I made the baby a funny gown/robe thing, and had a lot of the funny material left over and am in the process of making Aaron a robe. It is probably the funniest robe ever created and right now without sleeves looks just like something out of those Book of Mormon drawings you see. Pictures to come when it’s done sometime soon.
The End.
Okay, so I thought I was the only that worried about not-so-cute babies. I mean, what if the genetic lottery just isn’t in our favor? I’m glad I’m not the only one who wonders these things. Except I’m not pregnant, so maybe it is weird.
They TOTALLY make organic Oreos! I saw them at WinCo and I laughed so had I almost fell over. How do you make that creamy stuff organically? Wait, I’m about to kill my own story…maybe they were just whole grain. Whatever, it was still super funny.
hmmmmmm… i know that we have the same birthday – and based on your comment i’m assuming we are the same age. however, i have at least four gray hairs on my head and i’m just shy of 26 AND i don’t have any kids. where did i go wrong?!!! at least i’m not bald.
ps – i fear the ugly kid bit too. but i think you’re right when you say they’ll be cute to you. i think all parents think their kids are cute, they become blind, oblivious or perhaps just go into a state of denial once they have kids. you will have cute kids – and you will think they are cute. no worries.
Not to worry Kelsey. I had three ugly kids and still love them. At first I put bags over their heads (with eye holes of course). Every few days I trimmed off the bottoms, until their entire faces were exposed. It really helped me adjust.
Oops, that was mean. My kids were darling and Harmon will be oh so cute and possibly comical as many babies are — all scrunched for a few days.
You suck, Mom.
Kelsey, there’s no way your baby could be ugly.
You’re on the home stretch. Can’t believe how quickly time flies. Good luck with the birthing classes. I took one about a month before I had Brooke and by the time she came, I realized I had forgotten pretty much everything.