Swimsuit Sales

Now, let me preface by saying that although I have no experience in retail sales, I have a lot of experience in buying stuff, so I’m pretty much an expert.
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Dear Lady “Selling” Swimsuits at Costco,

I am pretty sure that it is your job to help people, to tell them interesting information about the promotional item, and to answer any questions they may have. I am pretty sure it is not your job to tell prospective swimsuit buyers they are fat. Seriously.

I was in such a good mood, upon entering Costco and finding that one of my favorite shirt makers was now making swimsuits. But then you had to go and tell me several helpful hints to make my day better:

1. “You definitely need the bigger size” (thank you, I am aware, and also I didn’t ask)
2. “You should get the one piece because children change your body and it’s not time for bikini bottoms anymore” (um, first, I didn’t ask, second, there were no bikinis and I was looking at tankinis with an ample bottom piece, and third, SHUT IT)
3. Repeat various forms of #1 and #2

Just because someone may be still be carrying their baby (ok cookie) weight, doesn’t mean that you can call them fat. Especially if you are trying to sell them swimwear. I suggest for the future you stick to the following talking points:

1. “You would look very skinny and attractive in that!”
2. “These suits are so modest! The bottoms are extra high and top extra long for maximum coverage.”
3. “Since you asked, the appropriate size for you would be….”
4. “You would look so amazing and good-looking in that suit!”
5. “I bet every suit looks good on you!”

Just try it. I promise you will sell more suits.

I bought the smaller size and it fit anyway, in your face,
Kelsey